Live from Korea

With Thanksgiving comes the beginning of the holiday season. When parents ask you incessant questions, siblings annoy you and you escape to hometown bars with old friends to get drunk and reminisce. It’s also a pretty strange time when you’re nowhere near home.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m generally not that into holidays. Thanks to exams and papers at school, busy times at work, boyfriends, an empty wallet, pure laziness, etc., I’ve missed my fair share of Thanksgivings and Christmases at home.

But this year, it’s different. Usually, if I really wanted to, I could hop on a bus or train and be home in a few hours, or even visit a few days later. Or I was on a cool vacation somewhere and couldn’t be bothered to even remember that it was a holiday, nevermind feeling like I missed it. (See below: Christmas 2010 in Dahab, Egypt.)

Who needs Santa when you’ve got that view?

This time around, Thanksgiving was just another day. I worked as usual. With the time difference, it wasn’t even Thursday at home yet. Our kids don’t really “get” what Thanksgiving is so I just got funny looks when I said “Happy Thanksgiving!” None of us foreign teachers really acknowledged it at work but everyone seemed a little down (except those pesky Canadians). 

But we were all pretty pumped two days later when we threw our Thanksgiving potluck! Almost all of us foreign teachers (and some of our Korean friends) gathered at our friends’ apartments who live a few doors down from one another for a pretty legit food feast.

We had ham, homemade pies, quiches, a giant pot of chili, a rotisserie chicken (thanks, HomePlus!), about 2 lbs. of pasta, smashed potatoes (courtesy of yours truly), some Korean dishes and a crapload of desserts. And wine. Lots ands lots of wine. Not bad considering we all have miniscule kitchens with two crappy burners and no ovens.

It was great having a little celebration to acknowledge the holiday in our own way. Being around other people who know how you feel is awesome — a little nostalgic and sad but also still happy that you’re on this journey. By the end of the night, I was feeling pretty thankful for my little Korean family. But that could have just been the soju talking.

One of the great things about Seoul is that there are quite a few fun, cheap things to do around town. So last weekend when the weather hit 75 degrees in November, it only seemed right to spend the day outdoors. Two friends and I hopped on the subway and headed to the Seoul Zoo. The zoo is at Seoul Grand Park, also home to a botanical garden and a “hobby museum.” Yeah, no idea what that is either. It’s great that it’s subway accessible. There were tons of families milling about (and, since it’s Korea, tons of couples).

Anyway, for only 5,000 won (a little under $5), we got entry to the zoo and a dolphin/seal show! Beat that. It was a bit awkward when we realized while standing in line for the dolphin show that we were the only people who didn’t have a child along. Oops.

The zoo was actually amazing — well, as amazing as a zoo can be — really enormous and well maintained. After hanging with our animal pals for a few hours, we went to a New York-style restaurant for Reuben sandwiches. Gotta say, for a place in Korea, it was pretty solid. It even smelled like a diner from home. Never underestimate the power of scent. All in all, a nice little Saturday.

 
Seriously, 75 degrees in November. Amazing.

Yes, I got American cheese instead of Swiss. Don’t judge me.

How did almost two months go by without me updating this bad boy?! If you’re waiting to hear about all the amazing, life-changing experiences I’ve been having… womp womp. Sadly, I’ve just been a bit more boring recently.

Sure, I’ve been to a Korean professional soccer game…

Encountered some of Willy Wonka’s Korean posse at Global Gathering…
 

and even celebrated Halloween in Korea!
 

Sometimes it’s hard for people to realize that while you’re living in a foreign country, while you do lots of exciting/different things, at the end of the day, you’re still living and working. So during the week, I do the same things as I did at home: work, workout, make dinner, watch bad TV. And on the weekends, while I do visit interesting places sometimes and get into random situations, right now my to-do list has laundry, grocery shopping and cleaning on it. Buzzkill! 

On the other hand, sometimes normal things are a bit funnier thanks to the language barrier/culture. For instance, I went to the dentist a few days ago. It was closer to a space center than any other dentist office I’d ever been in. A huge, industrial space with exposed beams and even an Internet center. The whole space was divided into little space pod dental stations.

The doctor came over, spoke to me in pretty good English and explained what they’d be doing, and then.. covered my face. Yep, they use a dental burqa here. It was a green piece of fabric with a hole for just my mouth. Awkward. They said it was “for my convenience,” but I usually enjoy being able to breathe while at the dentist.

Anyway. This was all a long way of saying I’M BAAAACCCKKK!

Now that I’ve been here for almost three months, I thought it was time for a little round-up of things I don’t quite get about Korea.

I’ve actually kept a little post-it note with some of these curiosities since I’ve gotten here but going to the Philippines was what really drove them home. There’s nothing like watching zillions of Koreans outside of Korea (it’s a popular vacation destination here) to realize just how strange some things are. Yes, I love Korea, I know it’s a different country with different customs, blah blah blah. I stick by my original question.

1. The bathroom situation: Squatter toilets and no freakin’ toilet paper anywhere. Korea, you’re so advanced. Why do you make going to the bathroom such a hassle?

Most businesses have only one bathroom that is shared between all the building occupants and these are usually the biggest squatter toilet culprits. I’m guessing it’s because the buildings tend to be older and it’s probably cheaper to maintain the facilities among several storefronts. Sometimes the businesses will have toilet paper that you grab before going to the bathroom, sometimes not. Grabbing a handful of toilet paper in front of a restaurant of people before parading around the corner to use the toilet is up there on awkward things. And the toilet paper.. buy one of the carry-in-your-purse packs at the corner GS25 because you’re sure gonna need it.

But lest you think that nicer, newer places always have toilets, think again. The first place I saw a squatter was at the hospital for my health check. Yes, the same hospital that had your name flash up on an LED screen when it was your turn. While I appreciate the constant quad workout, sometimes a girl just wants to sit and pee.

2. Drink, drank, drunk: This actually doesn’t really bother me, mainly because I find it really hilarious. Korea has like zero drugs. It’s not part of their culture and I hear that the repercussions are crazy intense. Fear not, however — it’s called Blackout Korea for a reason!

On any given night, you can step outside and spot several absolutely pissed drunk people (typically men). They’re usually being carried by someone to the curb or are sprawled out on a bench. The best part is that these classy specimens are usually wearing really nice suits and have come from drinking with their bosses or something. Getting tanked with your superiors is a given here and no one gives a rat’s ass how drunk you get. Policemen will nudge people to a bench or something but it’s just a part of working here. As long as you show up to work the next morning, it’s a-ok.

3. Couples: Korean couples are fascinating. They’re not very affectionate here at all, especially compared to the West. I rarely see couples kissing in public and even when watching Korean television, the actors barely touch each other. Add to that the fact that Korean friends, both male and female, hold hands here, and it’s kind of a weird vibe. But (you know that was coming) thank God there are other ways to show that you’re in a relationship. I bring you the matching couple outfits. 

Yes, there is no better way to show the world you are in a committed relationship than wearing a matching outfit. There are beach outfits with matching prints (guys get longer board shorts, girls get shorter ones), matching t-shirts and, if you’re feeling particularly frisky, matching lingerie. Nothing says I love you like a matching leopard print nightgown and boxers!

See also: “heart-shaped” photos. 

Alexa and my attempt to get the Korean heart photo down. 

4. Gear up: No matter what type of activity — swimming, hiking, ATVing — Koreans have every piece of gear known to man for it. It’s usually brand new looking and in your face. Riding the subway on the weekends is a real treat as you see people with their hiking boots and hats and sticks and backpacks and water bottles and a whole other crapload of stuff. On the subway. Where exactly are you going hiking again? When we go to the swimming pool, for example, my kids have bathing suits. With matching swim caps and floating tubes and floaties for their arms and waterproof zip-ups. It’s cute but seriously? Is this actually… necessary?

Someone please remind these people that they’re on the beach.

5. Red light, green light: I know, you’re probably thinking, now this girl is just being nitpicky. But ask anyone who lives here! Traffic lights take for-ev-er to change. Depending on how many lights I catch on my walk to school, my commute can take up to about 7 minutes longer. It’s outrageous. And stranger than that is, even when there is no one coming for miles, Koreans absolutely will not cross the street against a light— and they give you dirty looks when you do, even if you KNOW that this is the calm before the light changes green. Well, panicked looking Korean friend, I refuse to stand here for another 3 minutes while we wait for the invisible car to drive down the road.

Unless it’s raining, I’ve taking to wearing my Ray Bans the second I step outside to go anywhere. I can’t deal with being cursed out via people’s eyes all the time.

Ahh, Korea. You’re such a strange creature. But don’t worry, I’m already compiling my list of things I love about it here.